ALTER EGO AU

[enigmaster]

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[enigmaster]

[Edward does his best to forget about what an embarrassment that whole meeting was... and fails miserably, but at least he has the work. And it is nice getting to use his skills. Keeping a job in Gotham is difficult and he's been between jobs for a little bit now. Plus, well, now he won't have to worry about rent. As he predicted, the job is straightforward enough. Honestly, he goes over it several more times, just to be sure there's no catch he's missing. Even with that extra care, he's done pretty quickly. ...He checks a few more times after. Just to be absolutely sure he's missing nothing. But a new appointment is set up soon enough. They'll meet again soon, hopefully...]

[agoodname]

[They certainly will. Honestly, Oswald is both surprised and impressed at the speed at which the job is done.

Now he'll just need to see how well it was done.

The new appointment is set for the very next day, this time nearing noon, so at least there will be plenty of light for Edward to see any chairs in his way, what with those huge windows]

[enigmaster]

[He's there early, of course, so he can come in exactly on time. Having a much better time of it this time, now that he can properly see where he's going. That should cut down the embarrassment involved here.] Hello again, Mr. Cobblepot.

[agoodname]

Mr. Nygma. [Oswald shifts, setting down the report he was reading, and removing the monocle] Do come in and sit. [he motions once more to the chairs in front of the desk] I'm eager to hear your report.

[enigmaster]

[He takes a seat, trying to appear calmer than he did last time. Not that he has any idea if he's succeeding or not. It helps that he has a bit of a shield, in the form of his phone, which he's taking out to look at his written report.] Well, I can't say I have an awful lot to report. There were a number of holes in the security infrastructure, which were simple enough to locate and patch up. There were some holes that were easier to overlook and, well, usually if you'd be using exploits like that you'd probably be going for a bigger target than this particular operation, so I can't say it was a huge concern, but I took care of those as well. ...As well as some less... digital problems. [He taps something and his phone and turns it around to a photo he took. Looks like... a junction box, outside the building.] ...This was behind a gate, but that was about the extent of the security protecting this. Not to mention the weather proofing was a little lacking.

[agoodname]

[Oswald listens, closely. And he watches. He takes note of Nygma's mannerisms, how he talks, the references to his report, and finally, that picture. He considers] I see. And what is your recommendation for tackling that problem?

[enigmaster]

Considering I got through the gate easily enough on my own, making it less easily opened would be a start. A weatherproof junction box to replace the current, a sturdier lock... some spikes at the top of the gate, maybe. And a camera pointed at that location. A slight investment, but not too bad, given the trouble it'll cause if someone does get in there.

[agoodname]

[He nods to that, making some notes] Noted. Those alterations are easy enough to make. Anything else?

[enigmaster]

...Well, on the end of this that's less my territory really, but... [...] Maybe tell your employees not to keep their keys hanging on the wall. That just seems like asking for trouble.

[agoodname]

[at that, Oswald arches an eyebrow...but the corner of his mouth also quirks upward]

Too easily accessed by an errant hand.

[enigmaster]

I really honestly thought it was a joke when I first saw it... [guys has no one watched any movies ever guys???]

[agoodname]

[Oswald...blinks at that. That was rather frank. He arches an eyebrow]

[enigmaster]

[..............learn when to shut up, Edward] ...Well, I did. [stop talking]

[agoodname]

[that eyebrow arches a bit higher] ...I see. Anything else that made you think it was a joke? [dryly--to hide the amusement. He hasn't had someone he's only had a brief acquaintance with be this frank with him in years. It's almost refreshing.]

[enigmaster]

[he's... a little more hesitant speaking up, but can't quite stop himself from going forwards anyway.] ...Using keys at all, maybe. Locks are pretty easy to pick. Keycards or keypads are probably a safer alternative.

[agoodname]

Can those not also be hacked in some way?

[enigmaster]

Sure, but that will take time and some actual knowledge of the equipment being used. Any idiot can get some lockpicks and get in that way. [...] R...espectfully...

[agoodname]

Respectfully. [DRY but this is so entertaining??? and intriguing. Most people would be quaking in their boots right now, and granted, Oswald does like that, but...this is nice. A breath of fresh air.] I see. [he makes another note] Any other suggestions?

[enigmaster]

That's, ah... about the extent of what I noticed... [... he super fucked this up, no way around it...]

[agoodname]

Hmm. [Oswald looks over the notebook a moment, stretching it out for a bit] Very good, then. [he looks back up at Edward] Mr. Nygma, if you're amenable, I'd like to hire you as a full-time member of my staff, with updating the entire warehouse to the proper level of security in all forms as your first project.

[enigmaster]

[He's already bracing for the rejection that's sure to follow after running his mouth, but-- ... huh?] You... would? [...wait shit uh] I mean, I would be. Amenable, that is. Yes. Very.

[agoodname]

[Oh. That's adorable. The corner of Oswald's mouth curls into a slight smirk.] I would. If you'd like to start putting together a list of what you'll need to upgrade the warehouse, we can then review it and get you the proper funding. I'll also have your contract drawn up for you to look over.

[enigmaster]

Um... yes! Of course, no problem. Easy enough, really, won't take more than a few minutes of work...

[agoodname]

Excellent. If you'd like to do that, then, I'll have Mr. Penn draw up the contract.

[enigmaster]

Of course. I will get right on that... [AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA--]